The break down on lyrics

Today, I decided to have a snapshot of the music we listen to today. It’s all happy for people to bop along to their favourite track, but, do people actually realize the lyrics they sing? Sometimes I think WTF and other times I just laugh but think about all those children who are oblivious to the true meaning of what they’re listening to. It must be a nightmare for parents in our growing sexualised society.

But seriously, when you were a kid and you sang “I touch myself” did you really know what Divinyls were on about? Nothing wrong with masturbation and fantasizing about being with the person you love. But here are some of the lyrics:

I love myself
I want you to love me
When I’m feelin’ down
I want you above me
I search myself
I want you to find me
I forget myself
I want you to remind me

I don’t want anybody else
When I think about you
I touch myself
I don’t want anybody else

and here’s the video as a special reminder:

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So truly, this is the song that got me thinking about this whole topic and I’ve decided to break down the mainstream songs that get played on the radio(and played recently):

Johnny Ruffo’s “On Top”. Your question is: What is he on top of?

Well:

Tonight it’s going down
No-one else around
I’ll be on top of the world, when I’m on top of you girl
Ain’t no doubt about it
I know you want it now
I’ll be on top of the world, when I’m on top of you girl

What the frak did you just sing? That’s right, “I’ll be on top of the world, when I’m on top of you girl”

I support Perth talent but my gosh….

Next up:

Nicole Scherzinger’s “Right There”

The song is about expressing what you like about your partner and what he does to you. My favourite lyrics of this song:

I like the way that you talk dirty
Don’t wash your mouth out I like it dirty
You like to please yeah I like that yeah yeah yeah yeah me like it
I like the way that you keep me coming
That yeah you so good you had me running
Me like the way that he goin’ down down down down down

What the frak did you just sing? “I like the way that you keep me coming, That yeah you so good you had me running”

Too much detail me thinks….

And yes, I do need to target Australian artists as well because I live in this country and they are exposing me to this music:

Ricki Lee’s “Do It Like That”:

One taste of my apple pie, satisfy your appetite
So, baby get ready for this
‘Cause it’s about to get serious

You like it when I do it like that
You watch it when I do it like that
Gotta have it when I do it like that
You want, want, want me when I do it like that

Now, you’re probably thinking this song isn’t too bad with lyrics. That’s because you are blinded by the poppy beats and the fact that she is dancing in underwear. What the frak did you just sing? “One taste of my apple pie, satisfy your appetite”.

Yes she is talking about her vagina tasting like dessert…

And who doesn’t like a song about whistles:

Flo Rida’s “Whistle” gives insight on how to blow a whistle:

Can you blow my whistle baby, whistle baby
Let me know
Girl I’m gonna show you how to do it
And we start real slow
You just put your lips together
And you come real close
Can you blow my whistle baby, whistle baby
Here we go

What the frak did you just sing? “Can you blow my whistle baby, whistle baby, Let me know.Girl I’m gonna show you how to do it”

Blowing a whistle isn’t that hard but what gives this song away that he is talking about his penis is the fact that Flo Rida will teach you how to blow him… Don’t worry… He’ll teach you. Also, not enough booty in that clip.

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It’s too obvious to use every Nicki Minaj song or Rihanna’s S&M because they ooze inappropriateness. Next time you listen to a song, think about what you’re singing. You might just laugh. We sing thoughtlessly most of the time.

My boyfriend told me it’s easy to for people to like music because of their catchy beats. This is true. Why do you think Gangnam Style is so popular? Not the fact that he sings in a foreign language but the fact the dance beat captures you. There are so many dirty lyrics out there disguised under these magnificently created tunes and when you actually read the lyrics without music, you get exposed to a new way of listening to that song.

Breaking down lyrics has been an interesting way to spend my morning. I may do this again soon.

LiLi

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The Collector failed me

Watched the Collector for the first time on Monday night. Let’s just say it had the potential to be a really good movie but really bombed.

So I researched about this movie after watching it… well actually during the movie. This was rumoured to be a prequel to the Saw movies with the events taking place giving Jigsaw the ideas that followed in the Saw films. It didn’t go through as part of the Saw franchise, though had very similar ideas.

Stop reading now because it contains SPOILERS!!

So I started writing this 2 days ago but lost my train of thought trying to continue it. I scrapped everything and am now doing the shortened version. You’ll laugh because but shortened version ends up being oh so long!

Opening scene – couple come home, wife screams upstairs, husband finds her looking at a life sized box, husband opens, black gloved hand grabs him from behind.

Opening credits, then we move onto a family’s home being renovated. Ex-con scopes house whilst doing repairs. Ex-con tells exterminator there is wasp nest. Ex-con gets paid. Family’s eldest daughter flirts with ex-con. Family go on Holiday.

Ex-con returns at night. Dog appears on a chained rope. Woof Woof. Ex-con gets startled. Ex-con breaks in.

Ex-con goes to bathroom. Starts to unlock safe. Hears screams in air vent. Ex-con is not alone. Da Da Dum.

Ex-con investigates noises. Finds husband and wife in basement. They say eldest daughter is out and youngest daughter is hiding in the house. Finds all traps around the house. Get’s caught in some traps. Killer does not detect him.

Ex-con finds cat stuck in acid. Cat makes hiss noise. Killer investigates. Ex-con flings cat into window trap. Cat cut in half. Meow dead. Lame cum blood spurt all over ex-con’s face. Ex-con hides in bed pillows. Killer finally arrives and suspects no foul play.

Ex-con finds life-size box. Inside is man from opening scene. Old man cries the killer “collects people”. Ex-con tells him to shut up.

From here it goes on and on. Killer kills the couple (Oh what a big surprise!) Eldest daughter comes home with boyfriend. They don’t see the traps. Get to see boobies. Girl tries calling 911 but drops phone. They die obviously. And, they die in the traps. BUT, you got to see boobies.

In the end, the ex-con ends up leaving but then oh no… the little girl is at the window. Shit man… What does he do? He saves her! If the movie wasn’t painstakingly uninteresting, they just had to drag it out further.

Ex-con goes back in. Gets caught in some lame traps. Ex-con and little girl try to eletrocute killer with water, TV and fish tank. They FAIL. They failed because killer throws old man from box onto water

Everyone gets caught by the killer. They get tied up.

Police come out to investigate 911 call. Killer outside drops weapon when told to. Police call for back up. Killer sets dog loose on policeman. Policeman dies. LAME

Ex-con escapes with little girl. They run to road. All the cops are driving closer to house. Ex-con gets hit by passing police vehicle. At this point you laugh.

Girl gets taken away in cop car. Ex-con in ambulance. Ambulance drives off.

Ambulance gets hit.

Killer came back for ex-con. Traps him in life size box we saw at start.

THE END

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I forgot to mention the ex-con did end up stealing the jewel, but can’t remember at what point. It was after he investigated the basement some time. Oh, and also the couple die before the eldest daughter comes home too – also can’t remember when.

OK, if you’re a Saw fan like me you notice all the similarities. What this film lacked was film quality and story building. Acting was good in most part.

I get that the killer collects people but all the traps were designed to kill. Also, for the majority of the movie, the couple were in the basement, so, he laid all the traps out for the little girl? It seemed like overkill to me for one person because he would have already stalked the family prior to know the eldest daughter was going out.

So let’s go over the traps:

  • Boarded up windows
  • Windows that slammed shut with blades
  • Chandelier trap with knives
  • Bear traps
  • Acid on bedroom floor
  • Fish hooks hanging from ceiling of laundry room
  • Both front and back door added with an additional 4 locks
  • Spikes on staircase – but not both staircases, just the one
  • Booby trapped pair of scissors that led to wire that encased your feet flinging you into bed of nails stuck to the projector screen
  • Hidden razor sharp wires
  • Nail spike on telephone
  • Chained outside dog

11 or so traps? Who was he expecting to be in the house?

He locked the doors with 4 extra keyed locks and only unlocked them when the eldest daughter decided to come home. Even the killer was surprised when she got home. Obviously, the locks were there to keep people out, though he also wanted the people inside to not have the ability to escape. The parents he left tied up downstairs in the basement and didn’t even let them run around to get caught in his funny traps. The father was tortured to the point he couldn’t move, and the mum blindfolded and handcuffed. And, the killer didn’t even make a solid effort to look for the little girl.

So why were there so many traps? I don’t understand why so many traps were needed!! WHY?!?!  It just seemed all so pointless. He could have just locked the doors, killed the parents in the basement – which he did anyway and it could have been a hunt for the little girl. Now that, would have made for a more thrilling movie.

At least with Saw, there was a twist at the end which I’m pretty sure no one saw coming. With this movie, there was no twist. The killer caught the ex-con and locked him in the box. How uninteresting. I am glad it was not a prequel to Saw. I mean, it’s good that they did not milk that franchise further.

Also, who is the killer? It’s the exterminator from the start. But, you already knew that didn’t you? It was the only obvious answer.

Oh and guess what? There is a sequel. They better give me some story line and character building or else this will go into the lame movie pile. What’s the sequel called? you’ll never guess…. It’s “The Collection”

Whenever you visit an art gallery…

I mean no disrespect when I visit art galleries. Sometimes, I will stand there is awe of the beautiful creation. Other times, I will stand there thinking is that really art? Why would someone create this?

My wonderful place of employment organized an art exhibition tour. Now, this is really a different and refreshing change from the boozed up functions we normally have, and really gives people the opportunity, to be more open minded and lavish in timeless pieces of history.

This tour was special because we had a tour guide to really delve into the specifics of time periods, the change in how art evolved and what the artists were trying to capture in that point in time. We went on the Picasso to Warhol tour in Perth.

Some pics I captured:

Sorry for the mediocre pictures. They are taken from my iPhone. If you’re second guessing if that was a penis you saw. It definitely is.

So, are you like me in that when you look at this:

you think, “I can paint that?”

I swear, every painting I was saying to my boyfriend, “I reckon I can do that”. Bear in mind, I do not possess artistic flair in the slightest, and yet I believe, I can conquer painting a magnificently constructed piece of artwork. Now I’m wondering, maybe I should set myself a challenge and see if I could actually do this.

When I look at art, I think about what I like – good use of colour, the detail and what I think the painting represents. Ask me about brush strokes, the genre, what the artist is actually saying, the defining period and at that point you’ve lost me and I could probably make up some fluff to fool you that I am a passionate art lover.

What I often think about is how much do people pay for these pieces? and also how do artists live if you don’t have a steady income? Do artists only make the most money after they die?

What really struck me as odd is Andy Warhol’s soup collection. Why would someone pay $11 million for Andy’s small torn Campbell soup can painting. Yes, his work was pop art and a statement about consumerism but I can buy you a can of soup for $2, tear the label, paint you the picture of the can of soup with the torn piece of branding and would I get $11 million? This astounds me beyond words that 1) people would pay that money and 2) people are fascinated by a painting of a torn soup labelled soup can. Did anyone stop to think maybe one day all he wanted to do was silkscreen the soup can for testing purposes because that’s all it was… a soup can on a canvas with no meaning? $11 million….. Maybe we should all quit our day jobs.

LiLi